A Purpose

Once upon a time, in a classroom far far away, I read a poem by Rilke.

“Ich lebe mein Leben in wachsenden Ringen, die sich über die Dinge ziehn. Ich werde den letzten vielleicht nicht vollbringen, aber versuchen will ich ihn.”   I live my life in widening rings which spread over earth and sky. I may not ever complete the last one, but that is what I will try.   “Ich kreise um Gott, um den uralten Turm, und ich kreise jahrtausendelang; und ich weiß noch nicht: bin ich ein Falek, ein Sturm oder ein großer Gesang.”  I circle around God, the primordial tower, and I circle ten thousand years long; and I still don’t know if I’m a falcon, a storm, or an unfinished song.

For the past week or so, those words have been swirling around in my head. Well, snippets, anyway. I only remembered that last part, about the falcon, the storm and the unfinished song.  I don’t know what made me think of it now, years later.  Maybe because lately I have been feeling like nothing so much as an unfinished song.  I am a college graduate, unemployed, and living with at home. And feeling caged. At a time when I should feel like a falcon, soaring fearlessly through life and looking to the horizon, I feel instead like an song someone (myself) forgot to write an ending for. Sigh.

So I decided to spare my wonderful, brilliant friends any more whining and moaning about the state of my life, and actually do something about it. Writing has always been a creative outlet for me. It helps me to organize my thoughts, conceptualize ideas, develop plans, make decisions, and feel deeply. The written word has the power to make your heart soar the same way a symphony swelling or standing on top of a mountain at sunset do. At least, I think so.  Reading other’s words and putting my own down on paper gives me great inspiration.  This blog will – hopefully – help me figure out what I want from life and how I want to get there. And then, give me the kick in the ass I need to actually do it.

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~ by Bitterroot Buttercup on August 13, 2009.

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